Christmas has this amazing way of creeping up so fast. i still need to go shopping. the ever present dilemma is that each year i find myself with less and less money and more and more people to buy for. this becomes an excellent exercise in creativity, because not only do i have to come up with gifts for like 1000 people (which i am notoriously bad at), but i have to find a way to fund all of them. this usually ends up meaning getting expensive looking gifts from various dollar stores (i’m so addicted to dollar stores), re-gifting (don’t judge me, cuz you know you do it too), and sometimes making gifts or giving gifts that shouldn’t be gifts but have to become gifts because i’m broke and everyone knows it... stuff like peanuts... stick a bow on a bag of peanuts and there’s a christmas gift for my grandparents.

when did Christmas become all about the gifts anyway?... i think we could all learn a little something from ‘the grinch that stole Christmas’... except i want my gifts tho...

anyways... i’ve been skipping church for the past couple months... i’m not sure why... i think in my search for my sincerity i needed to separate myself from ‘church’... unfortunately i separated myself from God in the process as well... but His love is still there... thank goodness.

my pastor left our church 1 year ago, and since then we’ve had an interim... he resigned because of ‘dissention’ about a month ago so i’m a little distressed... but what can you do? i went yesterday tho cuz i had to dance... we had a guest preacher who was AWESOME! i’m beginning to think about virginia union for seminary as well... that's where he went... i was hoping to talk to him about it, but i didn’t get the chance... oh well... God lead me... that's the most important thing.